Spring in the South comes upon us early in the year and with it comes the inevitable allergy season. With temperatures soaring into the 60's and 70's over the past couple of weeks, everything is blooming and providing pollen along with all the other wonderful instigators of allergies. Like most children, 2 or 4 footed, mine take advantage of the times when mom is under the weather and therefore less than her usual vigilant self.
Yesterday, I was running a little late as is usual in my too booked life but thought that I would make it to work at maximum only 5 minutes late. That's what I thought...
I walked in to feed my herd of wild cats and was greeted by Pistol bailing off the counter into one of the water bowls. The bowl slid and hit the other water bowls sending water spraying everywhere and onto everyone within 6 feet. Predictably, he flew upward out of the water faster than he hit thereby further splashing water from the bowls and from his body. In the midst of this commotion, Katrina (aka the white witch), flew out the door and was loose. The poodle came to join the fun and started chasing Katrina who was so frightened she wouldn't move from the tiny little hole where she had hidden far out of reach. Anyone want to guess how late I was?????
The boys (the small 3 dogs in my herd) often go to work with me now since Rusty-dog is getting old and reverting to his severe separation anxiety from early in life at the time when I adopted him. For whatever reason, the boys screamed half of the afternoon while in their crate, complaining about being at work. If they had stayed home, it would likely have been worse.
When the craziness of the day was finally done, they were practically dragging me (and Rusty since he doesn't see or hear well and gets confused about where doors are) outside. My co-worker's car was parked closer so Buddy ran to it as the closest means of escape. I could hear the conversation in my mind:
Buddy: Let's go guys, here's a car, jump in!
Scout: Are you sure it's our car?
Buddy: Who cares?!? Let's blow this joint!
Scout: OK, man, who drives?
Buddy: It was my idea, I get to drive of course.
Scout: That's not fair...
Rusty: What are y'all talking about over there?
Buddy: No worries, Rusty, just jump in.
Rusty: But where's mom??
Buddy: Who cares, she'll make it home somehow!
Scout: That's not fair; I want to steer.
Buddy: Shut up you two and get in the car! I'll steer and y'all can operate the pedals.
Scout: Cool! I get the gas!!
Rusty: Pedals? I don't understand...you know I don't hear very well anymore...
Fortunately, they had leashes attached so I was able to prevent a carjacking. Would have made an interesting news story though.
The boys have also made further use of my fogginess to steal food, cat poop, etc., you know, anything they're not supposed to have that makes them sick and keeps me up all night further depriving mom of much needed sleep.
Now imagine fuzzy-headed, dizzy, allergy ridden mom who is more sleep deprived than usual going to work and attempting to answer some of the crazy client questions that arise on a daily basis. It's a scary thought, isn't it?
5 years ago
1 comment:
If only they could talk right?! funny post!
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